The Hospital Board had it sussed
The matter was briefly discussed
And seeing the chance for a rapid advance
They formed a self-governing trust

They hired some business recruits
Attired in pale grey suits
Who, with time to dream, concocted a scheme
To generate forecast 'green shoots'

They ordered the closure of beds
Replaced the departmental heads
Established new norms with some triplicate forms
And reported 'All's well' to the 'Feds'

Encouraging more competition
(Prescribed in their statement of mission)
They turned up the speed as required by their creed
Creating full healthcare attrition

Officialdom sat on the fence
Maintaining the evil pretence
And deaf to the cries, spouted sugary lies
While counting its shillings and pence